The Vulnerability of Vulnerability

I appreciate how the topic of vulnerability has burst onto our cultural scene in recent years. Thanks to Brene Brown- and her famous TED talk with over 38 million hits and counting- for taking this subject from her research papers to our dinner table conversations. Brene refers to vulnerability as the birthplace of joy, belonging, creativity, authenticity, and love. I like to consider it as an anti-inflammatory for shame and unworthiness.

While I am a champion for interweaving more vulnerability into our relationships and everyday life, to practice this principle is... well, vulnerable. It takes a lot of vulnerability to be vulnerable. I believe vulnerability is a practice- perhaps like a spiritual practice- exposing perceived darkness in order to gain more access to the light. To allow oneself to be known on a deeper, truer level is not a guaranteed feel-good moment. For all the evidence-based research and glowing testimonials, when I uncover myself more, it can feel like the bite of a frigid wind hitting warm, naked skin that’s been kept under wraps.

A devotee of vulnerability, again and again I took the risk of sharing the truth of who I am with shaky breath and my stomach in knots. Ironically the ticket to authenticity, acceptance, and freedom made me nauseous. But I persevered and kept encountering understanding from others when I expected judgement and rejection.

Today I am further on my journey- less nauseous and more amazed. The fact that my dear friend who knows my secret thoughts and feelings AND picks up my calls on the second ring affirms I am both known and loved- proving the reward of vulnerability is well worth the effort.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Embracing Winter

It’s winter. As the cold days persist I hear a familiar conversation around me. “I know we need the rain, but I am so  over this weather.” I can appreciate the polite acknowledgement of our need to replenish water supplies which precedes the more honest protest of our current climate. And for all the bitter commentary, gloomy dispositions, and added layers of clothing, winter isn’t going anywhere. I’ve heard it said that life is simply a series of seasons. I remember attending a weekend training with a wise sage who reminded the group that in our Western culture we are not taught to honor seasons. He reminisced of Native American tribes who respect and even celebrate the ebb and flow of seasons. When we learn to sit a little deeper in the reality of what is, we can access greater wisdom and other resources in this moment- as uncomfortable as it may be. I am not required to like winter. In fact I am a self-professed “wimp” when it comes to the cold. So I bundle up a little more, su
Read more

The Power of Placement

I  recently heard about a social experiment where people were shown a string of letters and asked to put the spaces where they thought the spaces belonged. The group of letters looked like: GODISNOWHERE Some people placed the spaces to make out the sentence GOD IS NO WHERE while others organized the letters to read GOD IS NOW HERE This experiment reminds me of the power of perspective. I often forget that true power is not so much in the soup of letters life has put in front of me, it’s in how I arrange them. My dear mentor constantly reminds me to “look through appearances to the truth”- Truth with a capital T. When the fearful, anxious part of me wants to run around screaming “God is no where!!” like my hair is on fire, if I can quiet down just enough I can access the part that quietly knows “God is now here”- even in the midst of seeming chaos. Whatever a person’s beliefs, a switch up of letter spacing has transformational power. This power transcends even the most
Read more