Am I Resisting My Rescue?

My friend’s daughter is training to be a lifeguard this summer. I’ve heard it’s quite common for someone who’s drowning to fight the lifeguard’s attempt to save them. Perhaps the person in distress is so caught up in the fight to survive that everything and everyone becomes an adversary- including the help they desperately need.

This gets me thinking about my own struggles to come up for air at times. Life can hit like a tsunami or worry fills up around me like the deep end of a pool, sending me into a dog-paddle frenzy. I pray for deliverance, a reprieve from what feels like impending doom. What I’ve noticed in these overwhelming times is that salvation often comes in surprising ways. Faced with an unexpected lifeline I tend to wrestle with the help like a drowning person wrestles with their hero.

I get so stuck in what I think the solution “should” look like that I reject the relief being offered. Unexpected remedies to some of my life’s biggest dilemmas have looked like: choosing to forgive without the other party’s apology, accepting what feels so unacceptable, not jumping in to save a grown-up from the consequences of their own actions, the list goes on.

It’s best I not judge the way the calvary arrives. The notion that surrender is the answer when I’m caught up in a struggle still baffles me. But do I want to be right, or do I want to be rescued?

“Help!” is one of my favorite prayers.“By any means necessary” may be a good follow-up line. Forcing my judgments to the side of the road makes me more accessible to the intervention racing toward me. I eagerly await its arrival, grateful and open.

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